


Bittersweet

by Naniiamo



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Farmer Iwaizumi, Goddess Oikawa, Light Angst, M/M, loosely based off Harvest moon, mentions of atsuhina, mentions of bokuaka
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-07
Updated: 2020-08-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:47:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25759843
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Naniiamo/pseuds/Naniiamo
Summary: Flashes of blue silk crossed his vision, keeping him from seeing the person it belonged to. Something deep in his chest forced his hands forward, but he could only weakly try to push away the fabric, to reach, to touch the being behind it.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Comments: 1
Kudos: 13





	Bittersweet

_A laugh rang through his ears, bright and vibrant and distant all at once. Flashes of blue silk crossed his vision, keeping him from seeing the person it belonged to. Something deep in his chest forced his hands forward, but he could only weakly try to push away the fabric, to reach, to touch the being behind it. But the layers never ended, they wrapped themselves around his wrists and neck and pulled tight while every fibre of his being begged him to let go---_

_  
_\---  
  


The warm glow of the sun from behind Iwaizumi’s eye’s greeted him as the alarm clock’s beeping pulled him from his dream. He reached over to silence it before resting his arm over his eyes. The day was telling him to start, but the ache in his chest begged him to sit with his dream for just a moment longer, trying to commit the laugh and the shades of blue that surrounded him to memory before they faded, before he opened his eyes to his solitude once again.  
  
He didn’t need to drag himself out of bed, to find himself something to eat and watch the weather before starting his day. Whether it was just muscle memory at this point or not, he wasn’t too sure, but he never dreaded the monotony of his humble life. This is what he had come here for afterall, the peace of rural living and satisfaction of hard work without the pressure of a traditional workplace.  
  
And hard work it was. The first rays of sunlight were just peaking over the horizon as Iwaizumi stepped outside to start his day. The chickens needed to be fed, the cows brushed, the crops watered.  
  


Rolling up his sleeves, he got to work. 

\---

It was well past noon by the time he finished, the sun now beating down his neck directly overhead. Kneeling by the river that flowed through his property, he cupped his hands in the water and splashed his face, letting out a satisfied sigh as the water cooled his flushed skin.  
  
It was just a moment, but Iwaizumi swore he saw the same figure he’d seen in his dreams dance along the surface of the water. His jaw clenched, and he dragged his hand through the spot the vision had been just a moment before. Water was all his hand met, and the ache in his chest throbbed. Always so close, but never close enough, just as unreachable as it had been in the dream.  
  
He let out a heavy sigh and pushed himself to his feet once more. The most physically taxing part of his day was complete, but it was far from over. He ran through the list of errands in his head as he slung his backpack over his shoulder and headed into town.  
  
His first stop was the poultry farm, greeted by an overeager Bokuto. The man seemed to have limitless energy most days, and immediately dove into a tangent about the ruckus one of the new chickens was causing in their coop. Iwaizumi laughed along, pulling out his phone to show him some pictures he took of his days old chicks that morning and Bokuto absolutely beamed.  
  
“Akaashi!! C’mere, you have to see them.” The man in question raised his head from the book he was reading and headed over to them, curious but mostly humoring his husband. It wasn’t like it was anything he hadn’t seen before, but still he smiled and gave Bokuto a light peck on the cheek. “They’re very cute Bokuto.” He returned to his seat, leaving Bokuto with a light blush dusting his face.  
  
Iwaizumi had to look away, it was a simple, tender moment, there was no need for him to hide himself from it. But watching them made the tension in his chest throb painfully, and it hurt too much to intrude any further. 

Iwaizumi gathered his purchase, just some extra feed for the new chicks, and waved goodbye to Bokuto and Akaashi, moving forward with his day.  
  
After dropping the feed off back at the farm, Iwaizumi spent the rest of the afternoon making his way through town, making a few stops along his way. The townsfolk had taken to him almost as soon as he moved in, by this point everyone he saw on the street gave him a wave or a gentle greeting. The comfort of knowing your neighbors, always being surrounded by familiar faces, it was a feeling Iwaizumi had longed for. City life had made it difficult to get to know anyone, the only opportunity being at bars, or clubs, or workplace events. While there were sure to be some people out there that were satisfied with that, Iwaizumi wasn’t. So here he found himself, warm smiles greeting him as he pushed open the door to the inn as evening approached, but even still he couldn’t shake the feeling that something was missing.  
  
“Iwaizumi!” A blur of orange called out to him, arm waving dramatically overhead, beckoning him forward. He smiled at his friend, giving him a playful slap on the back when he approached. The younger man was a ball of pure energy, even after what was sure to be a busy day at the beach restaurant he ran during the summer. The tourists always flocked there, whether it be for the food or the company, or the welcoming atmosphere the two created together. It thankfully left the inn a quieter place for the locals once everything closed for the night.  
  
Hinata dove right into the story of his day without much prompting from Iwaizumi, more than eager to talk about a particularly troublesome tourist, any remotely funny mess his employees got caught up in, or the dogs he saw playing on the beach that day.  
  
“The summer’s almost over, you still planning on heading back come september?” Iwaizumi inquired, sipping the beer the waiter, Atsumu, had brought to his table not too long ago. He hadn’t intended his inquiry to be anything more than curiosity, but the way Hinata quieted down, a light pink spreading across his tanned cheeks told him he’d struck something.  
  
“Well, um, I think I’m going to be sticking around this year.” Hinata rubbed the back of his neck, not too inconspicuously glancing over to the same waiter that had brought Iwaizumi his drink. _So that was it._  
  
Iwaizumi’s smile stayed in place, and he offered a small congratulations, but the beer sat a little heavier in his stomach. He really was happy for his friend, Atsumu clearly made him happy if he was willing to put his own city life aside for this one. Still the words left a bitter taste on his tongue, and it wasn’t much longer before he rose from his seat to float around to another table.  
  
The lights of the inn grew only more pronounced as the sun finished it’s descent in the sky, if he’d look out the window Iwaizumi would be able to watch as the stars made their appearances one by one. Iwaizumi’s body buzzed, the beer fogging his mind a little, but the ball in his chest seemed to come alive, twisting and turning and pulling as night settled in. Evenings were always like this, the yearning in his chest pulling him in a direction he couldn’t bring himself to follow just that moment.  
  
As he sipped the last dregs of his beer, he finally gave in. He paid his tab, and made his way into the night. 

\---

  
After almost 5 years of living in the town, the way the moon washed everything not touched by the streetlights in white left Iwaizumi in awe. The moon never seemed so large in the city, and he had never seen as many stars in his life. The view only improved the further into the countryside he walked, the dim lights of the town fading and the moon seemingly lighting his path. He looked up at the sky, stars peppering the sky brilliantly, and if Iwaizumi took the time to learn he’d more than likely be able to spot the different constellations as they made their year long trips across the sky.  
  
The stars had been just as vibrant the first night he took this path. It hadn’t been any secret, but in the confines of the night, with only the moon guiding him, it felt as though he had stumbled upon something sacred. 

Iwaizumi had had trouble sleeping the first year or so after he moved, the adjustment to the silence taking longer than he expected, often forcing him to give up his attempt at rest and pull on his shoes instead. He followed the worn path past his fields, across the river, the dirt leading him further into the forest than he had been even during the day. The unknown hadn’t stopped him, and he walked until the trees parted to his right, a smaller path leading to a small clearing.  
  
The moon seemed to shine brighter as he stepped past the tree line, beaming directly into the pond that took up most of the clearing. The sound of running water filled his ears, his attention drawn to the small waterfall that fed into the pond. The blue flowers that decorated the grass seemed to glow under the moon, growing denser and brighter as he approached the edge of the water. It didn’t seem real. That was the first time he felt the pull, this time only urging him to pull a flower from the grass and toss it into the water.  
  
It floated for a moment, nothing more or less than Iwaizumi expected, until the wind picked up around him and the whole clearing began to glow a pale blue. His eyes widened as everything glowed impossibly bright, blinding him for a moment before it calmed, and his vision was filled with creamy skin and blue silk.  
  


\---

  
Iwaizumi reached into his backpack as he approached the pond, no longer shocked by the ethereal nature of the clearing, and pulled out a small slice of bread wrapped in wax paper. He didn’t need the ache to tell him what to do anymore, it was instinct to bring a small gift whenever he came. He threw the package into the water. In just a moment, the weight that had rested on his chest all day was lifted, and for the first time in what felt like days he could breathe.  
  
The same blue light illuminated the clearing while Iwaizumi closed his eyes to avoid the burn. With his eyes still squeezed shut, he felt a tickle against his ear.  
  
“Good evening Iwa-chan~!” The voice sent shivers down his spine, lips brushing lightly against his cheek as a genuine smile grew across his mouth when he opened his eyes.  
  
No one would believe him if he told them. No one would believe that the Goddess themselves stood before him in that moment, even less if he mentioned the look of adoration that decorated their face.  
  
“Good evening Tooru.” The name felt sweet on his tongue, satisfying a craving he couldn’t indulge in, save for these small moments. His hand reached out and wrapped his arms around the Goddess, pulling them tight against his chest. Oikawa returned his embrace, gently stroking his hair. Both of them remained silent, locked in each other's arms, holding on to the brief moment of time they were allowed.  
  
Iwaizumi tried not to think about it, wishing he could ignore the tightness that was returning to his chest all too quickly. He tightened his grip and buried his head deeper into the Goddess’ shoulder.  
  
“Iwa-chan, is everything okay?” Oikawa’s voice dripped with concern, pulling away to inspect their lovers face, meeting sad eyes that made their heart break.  
  
It wasn’t easy to explain. How could he explain to an ethereal being the loneliness that always threatened to consume him, the jealousy he couldn’t always push down at the sight of his friends and neighbors leading lives with the ones they loved? Their moments together were fleeting enough, it only hurt to spend them discussing the pain the whole situation caused.  
  
“Hajime..?” His given name brought his attention back to his lover in front of him, his brown eyes finally making contact with crystal clear blue. Worry was etched into their face, eyebrows furrowed as they tried to decipher what was going on in his head.  
  
“I’m sorry Tooru…” His throat was tight, it was a struggle just to get the words to come out, only for them to be thick and heavy and not calming the worry that Oikawa felt. “It’s just hard not to miss you.”  
  
Understanding flashed across their face, settling into something a little more sad.  
  
“I’m sorry it had to be me.” Oikawa cupped Iwaizumi’s face in their hands, rubbing gentle circles on his cheeks. “I’m sorry you didn’t find someone human before me, I’m sorry I’m selfish and can’t let you go.”  
  
Iwaizumi shook his head, reaching up to hold his lover's wrist. “Please don’t apologize. You know I don’t want anything other than this.” He turned his head, pressing his lips against the palm of their hand. “It’s just hard not to wish I could have more of you.”  
  
Oikawa pulled his face back towards them, blue eyes piercing directly to Iwaizumi’s soul. “I know, and I know I shouldn’t apologize, but it pains me to see you this way.” They leaned forward, pressing a soft kiss to Iwaizumi’s forehead, beginning to feel the sand run out of their pocket of time. “You may not see me, but with every gust of wind, every ray of sun that touches your skin, every blade of grass your fingers touch, I’m there with you, watching over you.  
  
I will always be there, Hajime.” And without a sound, the Goddess faded away, slipping through Iwaizumi’s fingers once again.  
  
The words were meant to comfort, but tears stung Iwaizumi’s eyes, and the pain that had momentarily subsided made its presence known once more. Iwaizumi clutched at his chest, desperately trying to hold back his sobs, his legs feeling like lead as he dragged himself home.  
  
He hadn’t been lying. He cherished every chance he got to share their fleeting time together. Needing the privacy of night made it all the more difficult, Iwaizumi wasn’t always able to ignore the early start to his day to make it to their pond. He couldn’t put the Goddess above everything else, even if the thought killed him a little inside. His human worries were what got in the way, and only then did it hurt to be human at all.  
  
He kicked off his shoes at the door, stripped off his work clothes and crawled into bed, not caring about the grime that had yet to be washed off. He pulled the covers tight around himself, squeezing his eyes shut and hoping, praying that his dreams would be kind enough to spare him just a vision more of his Goddess  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I drew some fanart for this little fic of mine over on [my twitter](https://twitter.com/Flakeandbake1/status/1291582122793275392?s=20)!!
> 
> It's my first time writing a fic in years, so forgive me it's a little rough around the edges, but I hope this is the start of writing again!


End file.
